Ladies... I have something to say to you.

So a couple years back I was going through this phase where everyone I knew was coming to me with relationship stuff. One friend in particular constantly asked me for help, advice, the right things to say... you get the idea. Now I didn't mind it. I began to joke about writing a book. I still may one day, but we'll see.

Anyhow, the book idea was mainly at the encouragement of my dear friend. She made me feel like a genius every time I gave her an idea. I freakin' love that girl. I told her I would dedicate it to her.

Now this isn't a book (obviously), but a section that I had semi-planned occurred to me tonight and I thought I should share some of it. So here we go.

Ladies, these are some of the men you really should date before you get married.

*Disclaimer: I did not necessarily date all these, but if I did and one sounds like you know him, don't tell him please. I don't need any whiners around here.*

Every girl should date a musician. Really. Chances of you dating a musician with some success are slim, so go for the guy trying to start a band, or already playing music in some type of setting. That could be a guy playing in coffee shops, open mic shows, or even his church group. Wanna know why you should date one? Any guy who's heavy into his music is going to be super passionate. I'm not talking strictly sex here. They tend to be poetic (you will never hear your eyes described the way a musician describes them). If you get the chance, date a singer. Because there is nothing that compares to a guy singing a song just for you at the end of a date... okay wait, I got distracted. Be prepared for this to go nowhere though. Unless you find a guy who is just about ready to quit his dream, he'll be flaky and more committed to his "image" than he is to you. He's all about his stage presence and the fact that chicks dig it. So summary: date the singer, let him serenade you, don't get attached. Oh, and if you ask him to write a song for you, be prepared to hear this excuse: "I did that once before, and the relationship went bad. I just can't do it again right now." I swear you'll hear a version of that.

Every girl should "date down." Forgive me for sounding like a snob, but you know what I mean. Date the guy who thinks you're totally unattainable. He will worship you because he'll know he's dating up. Simple math, right? Don't just pick the first guy who comes along; at least find someone you have something in common with. You may actually discover that this guy is worth keeping around. So listen: someone who will worship you for being the hotter one in the relationship.

Alright, I have a term for this next guy. Find a makeover guy. Ya know the one that you like, but he could use an image change? You'll date him without the makeover you're dying to give him, but the makeover would make you two look so fab next to each other! So find the guy, start dating him, then take him shopping. Make it look like a trip for you. And happen to pick out some stuff that you think "will look soooo good on him." Cosmo will try to give you all kinds of ways to "change your man." If you want to follow that, do it. But here's the trick: if he lets you totally make him over then you need to ditch him. No, I'm not heartless for saying that, listen. If he is willing to become this completely different person (in the shallow sense that a makeover gives) then his testicles haven't dropped yet and he's not nearly man enough to tell people no. Seriously, I dated a guy who let me make him over. Total mama's boy. And while it can be nice to have someone that will essentially let you boss him around, it gets old quick. I promise.

Now bear with me when I mention this next guy because I know some girls will disagree. You need to date the hot guy who knows he's hot. At least one. Sometimes this guy falls into the musician category. To that I say, great! Two birds with one stone! So, the cocky hot guy will be the best accessory you can get. He's usually a jerk, but he's really current on the hotspots in town and he knows how to have a good time. You'll have fun with him and hit some of the best parties/clubs/etc. Just don't get invested, because it takes the right woman to make this guy commit. He's more likely to blow kisses at the mirror than at you. And really, when you look at pictures of your exes, don't you want to have one ex that your girlfriends are totally jealous about? Admit it, you do.

This next guy sounds about as crazy as my previous suggestion, but I have a reason. Date the guy that your parents hate. And I recommend this one shortly out of high school. Because let's face it, most people rebel when they graduate and turn eighteen. So what better way to rebel than dating the guy that your parents don't like you with? Now I am NOT encouraging a guy who beats you, deals drugs, or anything else illegal. Date a guy that rubs your parents the wrong way from day one. Bonus points if your friends don't like him much either. So you're thinking I'm crazy, but listen. As you date this guy, you will realize your parents might actually be right about stuff. I had that experience. First guy I dated after high school. He was older and pretty much a jerk. But did I listen to my parents? Or my friends? Nope. And guess what? After I broke up with him, I valued the opinions of my closest friends a lot more. You need that wake up call to realize that maybe others see the things you don't.

So yeah, this blog sounds nuts, but think about it. Dating is a learning experience, right? Unless you're one of the few that marries your high school sweetheart. I just wanted to throw this out there because for some reason it struck me tonight. Enjoy, and if you take issue with what I said, hit me up. It may make for another great blog...