An Update

The list is in desperate need of an update. I just read my old one out of curiosity the other night... yeah. We definitely need an update.

This time I thought I would make it fun and add pictures. You're welcome.

1. Brian Wilson - Yes, he's at the top. I know people hate the beard and some people think he's too weird... but I just LOVE him. To the point that some inappropriate things are said here at home. Hubby laughs it off, no worries. But that man... wooo. *fanning myself*

2. Joe Manganiello - I feel like a picture is necessary here because I know not all of you watch True Blood. Talk about hotness. And he's EXACTLY what I pictured from the books. Actually, he exceeded expectations.

3. Josh Duhamel - He will never leave. Never. He's my Leo. *sigh*

4. Gerard Butler - He almost didn't make it. But then I thought of Phantom. And his accent. And his general sexiness. *drool*

5. Phillip Phillips - I feel like a cougar posting this. I know I'm not THAT much older, but I feel like I am. He's just so adorable!!! And his singing... oh that boy makes me swoon. ESPECIALLY after he sang some Dave Matthews last night. I was a ridiculous, drooling mess. My husband may or may not have been shocked a little...

We'll see how long this one lasts. I just appreciate God's work a bit much sometimes. ;)

Wednesday Gift List

You only have six Wednesdays (counting today) until Christmas.

Did I scare ya? Because I totally scared myself.

Last year I did a couple gift guide things. So I thought since we're already entirely too close to Christmas I would start those up again. So today let's start with the men in your life.

So I don't think you've been living under a rock, but there's this sport called baseball. And the Giants won the championship. It was kind of a big deal. And Sports Authority has their parade shirts (which hubby totally wants).

Bass Pro has a turkey fryer. I don't get the whole big deal about frying your turkey up, but apparently it's this big thing. And hubby would totally be willing to try it if he had a fryer. So if there's a man around who is also interested... here ya go.

Bass Pro also has smokers. Which (again) my husband wants badly. I guess I shouldn't complain, at least he likes to cook for me.

And at a store completely unline the two mentioned previously, Sur la Table has fun cooking stuff. Like this nifty little deal to make sliders. I love sliders. They're just better than a big burger. We make them a lot over the summer.

And this. Okay, maybe this one is more a want for me than hubby. Anyone make jalapeno poppers? Stuffed jalapenos? You can totally be manly and do it over the grill now.

By the way, if Santa is reading and any of these end up at my house, I'd be pretty happy.

5 Things...

Okay, I was actually thinking about this a couple weeks ago and totally forgot. Or I wrote about something else. But whatev, I remembered today!

So remember my list? Yeah, it needs an update. So technically instead of 5 things today, it's 5 men!

1. Gerard Butler: Yup. He's still there. Why wouldn't he be? He's HOT and he sings. Perfect.
2. Robert Pattinson: Okay, I fully came to understand the buzz last year. He's the complete opposite of my typical type (if I had a type I guess it would be totally manly), but I love him anyway. *sigh*
3. Sam Worthington: New addition!!! The man is teh hotness (my interwebz friends will get the misspelling of "the"). I think I crushed on him when Terminator Salvation came out. Then he just started popping up everywhere and I loved him. Pretty much 50% of the reason I'm so stoked for the remake of Clash of the Titans.
   
4. Josh Holloway: I don't know if it's Josh Holloway or just his character on Lost that gets me. Probably the actual character of Sawyer. But whatev, Josh Holloway is NOT bad to look at. And I'm not gonna lie, he was totally in a dream of mine the other night.
   
5. Josh Duhamel: He's still there! Even if he did marry Fergie (yuck). I was reminded how much I love him when I watched Win a Date With Tad Hamilton! last weekend. He's so stinking cute.

There you are. A different version of 5 things today. So I always ask people to share, and y'all never do. I dare you post your celebrity list. DARE you. DO IT.

**So I'm not about to name drop, but ya know the degrees of separation thing? I am one away from Josh Duhamel and two away from R. Patz. Be jealous, haha.**

Oh My

Happy Friday to me.

found here

Last time I checked, that isn't how you compliment me.

Not in vanity, but in honesty here... I get hit on. It's not like I can't walk out of the house alone, but there seem to be spurts where it happens more often and I get seriously annoyed. Because someone needs to teach these manlets how to properly compliment a female.


Example of a not-skeezy encounter: this happened... oh, years ago. Tim and I were already together and for some reason I was wearing a fake diamond on my ring finger. I thought I was clever and I liked it. Anyway, go to the bank one day, go inside, and a guy holds the door for me as I walk out. I thank him (my mom taught me properly) and he says, "Every nice looking woman deserves to have the door held for her." I thanked him again and he talked to me for a second. Then (and this was tried casually) asked if I was free for lunch as he was on his lunch break. I thanked myself for wearing a fake ring and said I was engaged. He said, "Well I hope I didn't offend you. You tell your fiance he is a very lucky man." He told me to have a nice day and walked away. Polite (if a little fast on the lunch date) and didn't use stupid words or phrases to say he appreciated how I looked.


Now some typical failures: these are just random but have happened more than once. Whistling. What? I'm a dog that needs to be called to you? No, so quit your stupid whistling. Staring at me for a really long time and turning it into one of those dirty leers. Ew. I know what's going on in your head. And just so you know, if I had a bottle of bleach, it would be splashed in your eyeballs and I would be at home taking a rape shower (not a literal rape shower, just that shower that you need because you feel gross, you know that feeling).


So the worst of the worst? Stupid slang terms. "Boo" and "shorty" are not terms of endearment boys. They are stupid slang words that the majority of us find moronic, at best. Ya know what? I don't even like hearing "baby." Unless it's from hubby. Point is, this will not work: slowing down your car and leaning out the window to shout, "Hey shorty, what's up? You lookin' good." Any variation of those words are equally as bad. If you think I'm pretty and can't come up with a good way to say it, maybe you should shut up. If you're going to make pervert eyes at me, prepare to be burned at the stake (in my head) or confronted if you do it at the wrong time or when I'm with the wrong people.


I leave you with another story of successful flattery. From a first grader. That's right, his dad taught him right. About three years ago I worked for an after school program in the "bad" part of town. Really though, the statistics for this area are bad and we got walked to our cars if we left late. So as my students were leaving my classroom to go to their next section, I had a first grader ask me, "Miss Ashley, are you going to marry your boyfriend?" I told him we would get married one day. He said, "Good. You're too pretty and nice not to get married. You tell your boyfriend he's a lucky man."


I think the first grader made me blush. I told his dad about it and he laughed. I guess the kid had a little bit of a crush. I still think about how stinkin' cute that was.


So how about it men? Care to start teaching these boys and manlets some real manners?

Follow up for the ladies

So my friend "Mal" raised a point. I did make it sound like a lot of guys don't get the girl. But that's not entirely true.

The types I mentioned are susceptible to the same thing any human being is susceptible to: maturity. I know, you're thinking, "Boys get mature?! You're a rotten liar!" But it's true! My musician got over himself and got married. He's even got kids now.

The one my mom hated? After multiple heartbreaks (can't say he didn't deserve them) he's finally getting married. Well, at least he's closer to the wedding date than he was with his previous engagements. But it looks like this is finally the right girl for him (yes, I still talk to him).

I already mentioned that when you date down the guy might be worth keeping around. So I'll leave it at that.

Makeover guy... well if he doesn't have the balls to stand up to you and you actually like that, then I guess you could keep him. But I would wonder why you would want to! There are also the guys that resist completely - you could end up liking that. Then there are the in between guys. Like my hubby. He hasn't changed much, but he does wear flip flops and polos more than he did when we met. Of course I'm not sure he owned flip flops or polos when we met... point is, he changed just a tiny bit. But he'd die before letting me make him over completely. And I like that. Because his laid back mannerisms have rubbed off on me too. So anyway, makeover guy has potential.

The hot guy who knows it is a hit or miss. Some of them grow up and realize they don't want to be that nasty fifty-year-old that still hits bars for women. They take patience though. They're so used to being man-whores that the flirting and non-consideration of the real world (not the show BTW) can take a while to disappear. But they can be worth it. Although I don't know any that ended up being worth it. Wait... nope, don't know any.

And there's your follow-up. So are any of you asking what kind of guy you should keep? Well, I told you that some of these types can stick around. But there is no guaranteed good guy. I don't know you well enough to tell you exactly who to date. The family you were raised with makes a huge difference. But for me, I can tell you that the biggest thing when I was dating Tim was the fact that he so easily fit into my family. I'm seriously close with my family so that was super important. I never worried about leaving him in the room with my dad and uncle because he could sit there and b.s. right along with them.

So if I could tell you one thing, maybe it's that you should decide what is really super important. And I don't mean making a list, that never worked for anyone I know. Because most of the time those lists are made at an entirely too young and idealistic age. So how often are you going to find a guy that meets every requirement of a girl who still thinks she's a princess? Just look at the guys you dated and take note of the qualities that didn't work for you. Avoid that in the future.

There's no way anyone would ever call dating easy. And there's no way that the perspective of a complete stranger is going to solve all your dating problems. But hey, I try. And if for some reason something I said clicks and leads to you getting married, let me know. I like ego boosts.

Ladies... I have something to say to you.

So a couple years back I was going through this phase where everyone I knew was coming to me with relationship stuff. One friend in particular constantly asked me for help, advice, the right things to say... you get the idea. Now I didn't mind it. I began to joke about writing a book. I still may one day, but we'll see.

Anyhow, the book idea was mainly at the encouragement of my dear friend. She made me feel like a genius every time I gave her an idea. I freakin' love that girl. I told her I would dedicate it to her.

Now this isn't a book (obviously), but a section that I had semi-planned occurred to me tonight and I thought I should share some of it. So here we go.

Ladies, these are some of the men you really should date before you get married.

*Disclaimer: I did not necessarily date all these, but if I did and one sounds like you know him, don't tell him please. I don't need any whiners around here.*

Every girl should date a musician. Really. Chances of you dating a musician with some success are slim, so go for the guy trying to start a band, or already playing music in some type of setting. That could be a guy playing in coffee shops, open mic shows, or even his church group. Wanna know why you should date one? Any guy who's heavy into his music is going to be super passionate. I'm not talking strictly sex here. They tend to be poetic (you will never hear your eyes described the way a musician describes them). If you get the chance, date a singer. Because there is nothing that compares to a guy singing a song just for you at the end of a date... okay wait, I got distracted. Be prepared for this to go nowhere though. Unless you find a guy who is just about ready to quit his dream, he'll be flaky and more committed to his "image" than he is to you. He's all about his stage presence and the fact that chicks dig it. So summary: date the singer, let him serenade you, don't get attached. Oh, and if you ask him to write a song for you, be prepared to hear this excuse: "I did that once before, and the relationship went bad. I just can't do it again right now." I swear you'll hear a version of that.

Every girl should "date down." Forgive me for sounding like a snob, but you know what I mean. Date the guy who thinks you're totally unattainable. He will worship you because he'll know he's dating up. Simple math, right? Don't just pick the first guy who comes along; at least find someone you have something in common with. You may actually discover that this guy is worth keeping around. So listen: someone who will worship you for being the hotter one in the relationship.

Alright, I have a term for this next guy. Find a makeover guy. Ya know the one that you like, but he could use an image change? You'll date him without the makeover you're dying to give him, but the makeover would make you two look so fab next to each other! So find the guy, start dating him, then take him shopping. Make it look like a trip for you. And happen to pick out some stuff that you think "will look soooo good on him." Cosmo will try to give you all kinds of ways to "change your man." If you want to follow that, do it. But here's the trick: if he lets you totally make him over then you need to ditch him. No, I'm not heartless for saying that, listen. If he is willing to become this completely different person (in the shallow sense that a makeover gives) then his testicles haven't dropped yet and he's not nearly man enough to tell people no. Seriously, I dated a guy who let me make him over. Total mama's boy. And while it can be nice to have someone that will essentially let you boss him around, it gets old quick. I promise.

Now bear with me when I mention this next guy because I know some girls will disagree. You need to date the hot guy who knows he's hot. At least one. Sometimes this guy falls into the musician category. To that I say, great! Two birds with one stone! So, the cocky hot guy will be the best accessory you can get. He's usually a jerk, but he's really current on the hotspots in town and he knows how to have a good time. You'll have fun with him and hit some of the best parties/clubs/etc. Just don't get invested, because it takes the right woman to make this guy commit. He's more likely to blow kisses at the mirror than at you. And really, when you look at pictures of your exes, don't you want to have one ex that your girlfriends are totally jealous about? Admit it, you do.

This next guy sounds about as crazy as my previous suggestion, but I have a reason. Date the guy that your parents hate. And I recommend this one shortly out of high school. Because let's face it, most people rebel when they graduate and turn eighteen. So what better way to rebel than dating the guy that your parents don't like you with? Now I am NOT encouraging a guy who beats you, deals drugs, or anything else illegal. Date a guy that rubs your parents the wrong way from day one. Bonus points if your friends don't like him much either. So you're thinking I'm crazy, but listen. As you date this guy, you will realize your parents might actually be right about stuff. I had that experience. First guy I dated after high school. He was older and pretty much a jerk. But did I listen to my parents? Or my friends? Nope. And guess what? After I broke up with him, I valued the opinions of my closest friends a lot more. You need that wake up call to realize that maybe others see the things you don't.

So yeah, this blog sounds nuts, but think about it. Dating is a learning experience, right? Unless you're one of the few that marries your high school sweetheart. I just wanted to throw this out there because for some reason it struck me tonight. Enjoy, and if you take issue with what I said, hit me up. It may make for another great blog...